they get fogged up when we drink hot beverages.
they get smudged for no reason.
we will push them up using anything in our area (i.e shoulder, whatever is in my hand, scrunching my nose up so they get pushed up, etc.).
they get knocked off our faces all. the. fucking. time.
when we change clothes we either take them off or they fall off when we pull our shirts off.
we have to clean them after being in the rain.
we own multiple pairs of them, not just one lone pair for our whole lives.
most people don’t wear them in the pool, but some have extra old pairs for the pool (like me).
some people take them off during sex, that’s fine! but some people keep them on.
they don’t get squished into your face when you kiss (most of the time. at least from what i’ve experienced and i’ve got some mf big glasses).
if we look down and look back up while you talk/to peek up at something, we will just peek blindly over the top of them.
we clean them on whatever item of clothing is closest.
some of us have prescription sunglasses and some of us wear contacts when we need to wear sunglasses.
please keep some of these in mind when you write characters with glasses cause y’all who have 20/20 vision keep telling me all characters sleep in their glasses and own the same singular pair from age 6-25 and they never clean them.
( there’s this but you missed a few iconic glasses traits – “where’d I put my glasses” (is wearing them) – new glasses getting scratched on basically nothing. where’d the nick come from? we just don’t know. – forgetting you’re wearing synthetic material and just smudge the junk on your glasses around – after doing so, proceeding to hunt down any friend who is wearing a more cottony material – getting eyelashes on your glasses – stabbing yourself in the face with the arm of your glasses – “woah are you blind?” – “how many fingers am I holding up??” – walking into a warm room from the cold and suddenly being unable to see because your glasses fogged up – going outside and everything is Super Crisp 1080p – having three pairs of glasses and putting all of them at once – “aw dude you have transition lenses? lucky.” – the non-glasses scrutinising squint – taking off your glasses and suddenly you’re a different entity entirely – if you’re too good for taking off your glasses when dressing/undressing, realising you didn’t pull the collar of a shirt out enough and subjecting to your fate )
-For female characters wearing eye makeup is pretty much useless
– the reason why is because no matter what we do, the mascara will smear on our glasses
– thinking “Oh, there’s a little smudge. I’ll just clean it quickly”, then taking the glasses off and wondering how the hell you could see with what looks like three layers of dirt on them
– giving your loved one a little kiss but in the wrong angle so their nose touches your glasses
– the look™ when you’re in your bed lying on the side with your glasses on (aka the glasses are skewed)
– the sigh when you reach for your glasses and instead of grabbing them, you just knocked them onto the floor
– blindly feeling around for your glasses. yes, we all have velma moments.
– alt: if you have prescription sunglasses. wearing those to find your glasses when you misplaced them
– the “how blind are you compared to me” friends with glasses trade off
– Falcon Vision headache when you get a new prescription
– trying on all the fun frames when you need a new pair, but picking a pair that are similar to your old pair in the end
– alt: you do get a fun new pair and the wait for someone to ask “did you get a new pair of glasses?” (it’s like a bold new haircut but for your eyes)
– holding them up to the light and whispering “holy shit how can i see through these” because of all the junk
– having friends put your glasses on you but they put the arm on your ear instead of behind it
– taking 150000000 pictures when buying new glasses
– glasses tan
– that weird white residue on the sides from your hair products
– owning the spray cleaner for 10 minutes and then loosing it
As a teen
– having parents pock out lenses
– they dont like the pair you chose
– (blind parent w/out glasses or contacts) them asking to try on your glasses then proceeding to say, “nope, still blinder than you”
– not noticing details until you take off your glasses
– having to consistently check if they’re dirty; they’re get dirty every time
– losing your glasses on a school day and thinking , “fml”
– 20/20 people asking if they can try on your glasses and them saying ,“it’s so blurry, how can you see in these???”
Idk about y’all but I clean my glasses with an alcohol wipe every time I shower/wash my face. I can’t live like that. *scrunches nose*
@ those people who start binging ur story and leave tons of lil comments so u can track their progress: you rock
@ those people who read ur whole story in one night and leave a huge excited review at the end: you rock
@ those people who have been there from the beginning and make a point to leave a comment on every update: you rock
I betcha never knew that we call mantis shrimp, in Chinese, ‘piss shrimp’
announcment: hiatus
I’m going on hiatus regarding my main fic and posting, likely until December. I’ve been testing if I can handle school and the fic together, and for the last month it hasn’t been too great. I’ll still work on the drafts but so far there’s a few event pacing problems I haven’t worked out yet due to issues with infodumping/exposition so with this in mind I thought I’d rather let it ferment like what happened with most of the fic, the AU starting a month or so I started writing it and all.
Mom: ay the arms are short
M: I know it’s just a draft I’m trying
Mom: the arms are short
M: it’s just a draft I’m trying out the clothes dhgk
Mom: the arms-
M: I know!!
honestly I had a very side chapter on AU!Roland and Leander just going ‘hey can we like, paint your void hand with concealer or smth’ but it doesn’t stick in the mind dump